Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Who's Your Nabby?
A scrappy hottie from Chino, you say? SI has a hilarious, and oddly accurate, photo montage comparing NHL stars with their lookalike Hollywood Stars.
I was just as happy to see Nabby compared to Ryan from the OC as I was to see the Flames' captain Jarome Igninla compared to Mike Tyson. In Mike's defense, he still has his real teeth.
And, hai, Marco Sturm and Adam Sandler! Awesome. But Big Joe and Rhys Ifans? What the fuck is a Rhys Ifans? Dude, we do not compare hockey players to British actors. Note I am resisting another teeth joke. I hate to be redundant.
In case you don't follow hockey [hmmm, Trimbo?], you should know that the Sharks finally closed the deal in Game 7 of the Western Conference Semi-Finals last night. Get ready, Dallas. With the dude from Napolean Dynamite on as center, you're sure to give it up in 4.
Source: Sports Illustrated via Defamer.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Where the Sidewalk Ends
Starbucks finally opened up in Crescent City, where Meg lives. Seems like maybe the last place on earth to get an SBUX? Well, now you know why.
Friday, March 21, 2008
How to Stop the Examiner
Finally! Contact information to stop the Examiner from trespassing on your property with their unread crap landfill fodder:
866-733-7323
circulation@examiner.com
The only good thing about having these goddamn papers cluttering up the sidewalks is that you can use them for emergency dog shit receptacles. I'll just have to carry more blue plastic bags now (thanks, Supes).
866-733-7323
circulation@examiner.com
The only good thing about having these goddamn papers cluttering up the sidewalks is that you can use them for emergency dog shit receptacles. I'll just have to carry more blue plastic bags now (thanks, Supes).
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Moooovin. . . onto the Interweb
I know everyone hates those Star 101 billboards, but my best friend Julie Gahan is guest-starring on the waayyyy better 99.7 website.
You know 99.7--they play the shit we used to dance to at our Burlingame bars back in the day (by which I mean the 90's). Well, Julie is living proof that people do win radio contests, and get free food and DJ meet and greets. Yay Julie!
Saturday, February 16, 2008
MY KID WON'T BEHAVE LIKE THAT (another lie I tell myself)
I am terrified that I am going to raise a monster child. Despite the fact that I was not a bad kid, neither was my husband, neither were our siblings. . .I see them all around me and I can't help but think it could be inevitable in this modern era. Maybe it's in the water, like ADD and autism. Perhaps brattiness is linked to vaccinations or plastic leaching into water bottles. Maybe Nolan's age group will be known as "Generation B."
Yesterday I was at McDonald's for lunch (in my defense, I had a hangover). Now, this is the McDonald's on Haight and Stanyan, which is usually populated by equal parts tourists and drug addicts. Yesterday, though, it was weirdly full of local old people. One of them had a little gaggle of grandchildren with her. They were seated at the table next to me. They were noisy and running around, but whatevs--they're kids, it's fine.
Well, it's fine up to a point. For me, that would be when the oldest, AIDAN AIDAN AIDAN, who appeared to be about 7, started climbing up on the chair at my table. And yelling. And climbing. And thrashing around like a little epileptic. Grandma was trying to corral this kid by telling him AIDAN AIDAN AIDAN NO AIDAN but I guess AIDAN AIDAN had trouble hearing her over the sound of his little shoes kicking my table. So, being hungover, I turned and gave him the hairy eyeball. To no one's surpise, AIDAN AIDAN AIDAN gave it right back.
Poor Grandma was trying to get the kids out of the restaurant. AIDAN AIDAN's two siblings were just as terrifying. . .a boy and girl, with big bro dangling a toy that little sis was trying to catch with her mouth. On the floor. Of the McDs. Where all the drug addicts hang out.
If God is reading this blog, he is no doubt poised to aim a thunderbolt of hyperactivity at my kid, turning NOLAN NOLAN NOLAN into a spastic short bus paste-eater because of Mommy's bad taste in blogging shit about other children. This is, after all, the kid who pulled a fistful of his own hair and made himself cry. But I'm sure other parents have this fear, right? Or is everyone else just more self-assured about their ability to instill good behavior and moral character in their kids? Or maybe they just beat their kids. [Clong: KIDDING! Don't call CPS on me].
Yesterday I was at McDonald's for lunch (in my defense, I had a hangover). Now, this is the McDonald's on Haight and Stanyan, which is usually populated by equal parts tourists and drug addicts. Yesterday, though, it was weirdly full of local old people. One of them had a little gaggle of grandchildren with her. They were seated at the table next to me. They were noisy and running around, but whatevs--they're kids, it's fine.
Well, it's fine up to a point. For me, that would be when the oldest, AIDAN AIDAN AIDAN, who appeared to be about 7, started climbing up on the chair at my table. And yelling. And climbing. And thrashing around like a little epileptic. Grandma was trying to corral this kid by telling him AIDAN AIDAN AIDAN NO AIDAN but I guess AIDAN AIDAN had trouble hearing her over the sound of his little shoes kicking my table. So, being hungover, I turned and gave him the hairy eyeball. To no one's surpise, AIDAN AIDAN AIDAN gave it right back.
Poor Grandma was trying to get the kids out of the restaurant. AIDAN AIDAN's two siblings were just as terrifying. . .a boy and girl, with big bro dangling a toy that little sis was trying to catch with her mouth. On the floor. Of the McDs. Where all the drug addicts hang out.
If God is reading this blog, he is no doubt poised to aim a thunderbolt of hyperactivity at my kid, turning NOLAN NOLAN NOLAN into a spastic short bus paste-eater because of Mommy's bad taste in blogging shit about other children. This is, after all, the kid who pulled a fistful of his own hair and made himself cry. But I'm sure other parents have this fear, right? Or is everyone else just more self-assured about their ability to instill good behavior and moral character in their kids? Or maybe they just beat their kids. [Clong: KIDDING! Don't call CPS on me].
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